Dear Reader,

Walking along a very busy street in London’s West End recently, I found it difficult to make my way. There were so many people; moving in different directions at different speeds, and I’m carrying my gym bag, managing to bump into nearly everybody - and not moving nearly as fast as I wanted to.

I tried harder to really focus on how and where people were moving - trying to spot who was heading on a collision course and which slow-movers I would need to duck around. Of course, that hard-focus just made it worse - no way could my brain keep track of all that information. And none of the Londoners around me were putting that much effort into it - how were they managing?

I remembered that I needed a ’softer’ focus - using my peripheral vision. And that I needed a wider awareness of the patterns and rhythms of movement - and that I had to somehow hand all that stuff over to my subconscious, while I got on with the business of getting to my meeting! Now I got it, I could move at whatever speed I wanted to, with the minimum of effort.

And I’m curious now about how this shows up for you at work?

How do you get in synch with the rhythms and patterns of other people?

How do you keep your awareness of what’s going on ’soft’ enough to spot the important trends, yet still include enough detail to get to where you need to go?

With best regards,

Executive Life Coaching for smart, motivated people.

Dear Reader,

This week, I’m turning my Monday Message over to you.

What are you learning, struggling with or succeeding with that’d be helpful for others to know about - in your work or the rest of your life?

Or maybe you just feel like letting a few other people know about your work.

Please scroll down to the “Leave a Comment” box, write what you want to write and then hit the “Press me now” button.

Then check back here later on, to see what other peope have been saying.

With best regards,

Executive Life Coaching for smart, motivated people

Dear Reader,

After yesterday’s Remembrance Day events, I want to write about ’service’.

I’m nearly always moved to tears by the sight of those old soldiers and airmen and other service people marching to the Cenotaph and the looks on their faces as they remember fallen comrades.

What must it have been like to be expected to give that much?

If I sent you my CV you’d probably say that there’s been (and still is) a lot of ’service’ - for charity and business and such, in my life and work. Yet for me, that’s pretty much always been a very calculated decision - what do I stand to gain or learn, and what will it ‘cost’ me?

 - and when the balance changes so that the cost is too far in excess of the benefits, I’ve been ruthless in knowing when to move on.

Yet I’ve been around enough different people and have coached for so long now, that I know that not everybody makes that calculation. For many people it seems to me that the ’service’ IS the equation.

As luck would have it, one of my spare time activities recently reached the point where the effort I’m putting in now outweighs what I’d usually regard as payback - by quite some margin. Almost daily I’m tempted to move on; and almost daily I’m drawn to stay, and see what it’s like to just serve. Maybe there’s something else in the equation - even beyond the immediate learning around the usual kind of Servant Leadership stuff - that I instinctively feel but haven’t consciously understood yet?

Help me out here.
Does this kind of thing turn up in your life and work too?
How do you decide to ’serve’, if at all?
What calculations do you make about it?

Will you take a moment please to add your thoughts and comments to this message on my blog, by scrolling down to “Leave a comment”?

You can also see what others have already said and even explore around to read previous messages and comments.

Best regards,

Executive Life Coaching for smart, motivated people.

PS. Next week I’m going to ask YOU to write my Monday Message. I’ll send you a brief reminder and a link to the relevant blog comment section. Then it’ll be up to you - watch this space!

Dear Reader,

I was on a course recently, part of which was a short ‘taster’ session in Scuba diving, which held a fair amount of fear for me - especially the bits where you remove the mouthpiece and blow bubbles underwater.

We’d been promised some special briefing for contact lens wearers (that’s me), which we then didn’t get - and I forgot about until the next morning. There I am, up early, getting stuff together to head off to the dive centre and I’m feeling pretty anxious, when the voice inside my head starts up:

“They didn’t give you the contact lens instructions. How can they expect you to turn up for the training without that?”

And I notice I’m getting righteously indignant, angry even: “That’s right, they forget to tell me what to do about my contacts. That’s it. Sod ‘em, I’m not going. That’ll teach them!”

I went anyway, despite the voices in my head, and had a fantastic time.

When you start watching out for it, you can see this “self-sabotage” mechanism operating in all kinds of ways - keeping you from doing something you might actually enjoy or benefit or even learn from, but which holds some kind of fear for you, and which your subconscious feels you need ‘protecting’ from.

How about you? Where does this self-sabotage appear for you - perhaps in your work, your relationships, your body or physical appearance, or your own learning and self-growth? And what do you do about it?

Oh, and the special briefing for contact lens wearers?

“Keep your eyes closed when you take your mask off underwater” - Duh!

Will you take a moment please to add your thoughts and comments to this message on my blog, by scrolling down to “Leave a comment”?

You can see what others have already said and even read previous messages and comments.

With best regards,

Executive Life Coaching for smart, motivated people.